I support breastfeeding and co-sleeping when that is what works for the family; occasionally a nursing relationship becomes complex in the toddler and preschool years if the whole relationship becomes about nursing: The nursling wants to nurse every time s/he sees the mother, insists on it, throws a fit if s/he cannot nurse then and there, etc.
I have helped families dealing with such a situation, so I’m offering a little bit of insight here. Although it is not exclusively the purview of milk remedies, older children who still are wanting to nurse frequently often benefit from a milk remedy. [I learned this from Lou Klein.] Milk remedies are made from the milks of animals–lioness, mare, dolphin, for instance.
There is a more specific picture, I find, for toddlers and preschoolers who need the remedy Lac Maternum. They will want to nurse upon seeing the mother, and nursing often ends up defining the relationship. Even patient, generous, breastfeeding-committed mothers become exhausted in such a relationship, not to mention that the relationship feels one-dimensional. [My early awareness of this remedy's existence was courtesy of Pat Deacon.]
The pregnancy that carried a child who benefits from Lac Maternum often seemed idyllic to the mother. She will describe the pregnancy as being so amazing, that she spent a lot of time meditating, walking, etc. This part gets a little “out there,” so beware: Apparently, the issue, then, for the child is that the space is so open that s/he doesn’t come fully into his or her body and cannot individuate or needs the comfort of that attachment to the mother to comprehend connection to the physical world.
Say what?! Here’s what it might look like in a child …
One boy I helped, G, was a year old when his parents asked for my help. He woke frequently at night to nurse, couldn’t nap outside her arms, and wanted to nurse every time he was reunited with her–even if she’d simply left the room for just minutes. She was exhausted, as you can imagine [she had two older children too!]. I inquired about the pregnancy and, sure enough, she described the amazing pregnancy she’d had–meditating, etc. I suggested Lac Maternum 30c. G did incredibly well on the 30c … for 24 hours: He woke only twice at night, napped by himself, was much more contented.
Since it lasted him only 24 hours, I suggested Lac Maternum 206c next. Yes, you read that correctly–206c. There was no 200c, only 206c. G’s response was magical–much greater contentment, easier time with visitors, blossoming relationship with his mother that was not confined to nursing, asking to sleep in his crib, and eventually sleeping through the night. His parents reported that G was much happier and that G’s progress opened up possibilities for their family and a lovely new family dynamic, not to mention better sleep for his mom! G took doses as needed from then on, approximately monthly for several more months, and of course with each dose, the difficulties dissipated more while the joys increased exponentially. Such a blessing!
In another case, a girl, D, was on the cusp of her 4th birthday. D wanted to limit her nursing according to her mother’s wishes, but she just wanted to nurse soooo badly! If she couldn’t nurse, she’d ask to just hold her mother’s breasts. Her mother worked outside of the home, and immediately upon returning home was greeted with an eager nursling. D’s younger brother nursed even less than she did! What struck me about D was that she did not have favorite anythings–except nursing. No favorite color, game, etc. And her mother had enjoyed long meditative walks, frequent meditation, etc. during pregnancy. D took Lac Maternum 206c, after which she blossomed with a brightened confidence that showed itself in independence [playing on the backyard swing by herself, for instance], had a better appetite, and became less and less interested in nursing.
D’s mother left on the longest business trip of the D’s life [one week, overseas] just one week after D started the remedy. This did affect D’s swift progress, but I’m glad she had the benefit of the remedy when she was going through the difficulty. And, on her fourth birthday, D officially and happily weaned and never looked back.
One of my goals on this site is to share with you others’ stories of healing with homeopathy in their own words, to share the uniqueness of each homeopathic journey. Here is one such story of someone who asked for help with her daughter, L, who was a very insistent nursling. By the time L was 3 years old, it became physically and socially awkward to nurse L in some public places. L responded by throwing tantrums when her demands to nurse were not met at the grocery store, family gatherings, etc. Here’s the summary, in her mom’s words [italicized, parenthetical notes are mine]:
Our family has used homeopathy for over 10 years, the majority of it being pretty basic: Arnica for trauma & bruises, Calendula for stings & scratches. After reconnecting with Pamela a few years ago, and finding out she studied homeopathy, she has become our go-to person for various ailments.
Awhile back, I asked Pamela for help with weaning L. Pamela noted that young L reminded her of a cat, with a Cheshire cat grin. [As confirmation, kittens were L's favorite animal, too.] And Pamela and I discussed how difficult L can be, beyond the typical “terrible two” behaviors. It was obvious she has a strong personality but our whole family had been negatively affected by L’s intense outbursts and unreasonable demands. Pamela felt that I should try Lac Felinum (Cat’s Milk) as a remedy for L. We tried it and it worked! After a dose, L was much more reasonable and cooperative, and not prone to terrible outbursts.[Initially, L's outbursts centered around demands to nurse. Not long after she began the Lac Felinum, she weaned herself. Lac Felinum has continued to be beneficial to L, however, when L became exceedingly uncooperative or clung so to her mother that L was unable to enjoy even her favorite activities.]More recently, Pamela provided valuable assistance with my husband’s minor surgery. She gave him a special surgery remedy and recommended dosages before and after his surgery. Of course the hospital provided vicodin for pain, but with Pamela’s special surgery remedy (and continual contact) he was able to heal and recover without taking any of the pain medications. She checked in with us all weekend to see how he was feeling and made changes to dosages as needed.We feel very fortunate to have had Pamela’s homeopathic assistance over the years.
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